A Ghoul Versus The Amazing Spider-Man 2 (Part 2)

Click here for Part 1!

Meanwhile, Harry strolls right into Ravencroft because I guess being fired from Oscorp has no effect on his security clearance on any of the other buildings they control. To their credit one guard does try to stop him, but Harry just kicks his ass and knocks him out with his own taser. He sneaks into Max's cell, making a deal with him: he'll free him in exchange for Max getting him into Oscorp.

Security rushes into the room, starting to drag Harry away when Max transforms into pure electricity and kills all of them. He shifts back into his physical body, somehow also forming shorts and a small power meter on the side of his head. Don't... don't ask. Don't expect ANYTHING to make any sense in this movie anymore.  Exiting the subway, Peter receives a voice mail from Gwen that she got accepted to Oxford and is leaving for England right away. Harry and Max kill their way into Oscorp tower, Max now able to form an entire bodysuit out of electricity. I don't think Kurtzman and Orci know how electricity works, I'm just saying.

A Ghoul Versus The Amazing Spider-Man 2 (Part 1)

Previously on The Amazing Spider-Man...

One of the most underwhelming Spider-Man origin stories EVER was unleashed upon the world, as the entire film went through the motions of the story without really putting work into any of it. No, that's not quite accurate as they put a lot of work into making his origin as overly complex as possible. He wasn't just bitten by a radioactive spider, now it's a genetically engineered spider his dad helped create as part of a human/animal cross-genetics program and you know what, I don't even care. It was WEAKSAUCE.

It wasn't all bad though, as it at least had some very good acting and a very strong female lead that wasn't just some generic badass like we usually get in these kind of movies. Writer James Vanderbilt kept his past tendencies in check and delivered a pretty coherent tale outside of how Peter got his powers, which was a very nice breath of fresh air.

HOWEVER, in this day and age of bloated films was ABSOLUTELY UNACCEPTABLE to Fox. They let Vanderbilt write the sequel but his script must have been too simple so they brought in Hollywood's Golden Boys Alex Kurtzman and Roberto Orci to rewrite it and make it up to par for today's Hollywood.  You remember them, don't you? With them behind the helm, this ought to be interesting.  And by interesting I mean painful.  Fire up some Hans Zimmer dubstep (!) and get ready for A Ghoul Versus The Amazing Spider-Man 2!

A Ghoul Versus The Amazing Spider-Man (Part 2)

Click here for Part 1!

Before they can throw down Peter gets called away to save a kid from falling to his death, allowing Connors to escape. The next day Captain Stacy holds a press conference to announce he's issued an arrested warrant for Spider-Man, as he was the only person at the scene that was identified. Uh-huh, in this era of people being glued to their smart phones NO ONE got a single picture of Connors as the Lizard? If you're going to update Spider-Man's origin to be more modern, you really have to account for things like this as well. Come to think of it, where is J. Jonah Jameson and the Daily Bugle at this point in the story?

Peter goes to talk to Connors about the giant reptilian creature he encountered the night before, and this scene is hilarious in that Connors does everything in his power to make it obvious that HE'S the Lizard. Peter, who actually is quite competent in this movie, immediately picks up on this and goes to Captain Stacy to report it. Naturally though Stacy doesn't believe a word of it, but his interest is at least a little piqued to have his men research Connors a bit further. This JUST MIGHT BE the most positive portrayal of a pseudo-antagonist police officer I've ever seen in a superhero movie.

Heading back to school, Peter notices a bunch of small lizards crawling into the sewers... for some reason. Is the Lizard spawning little sidekicks or does New York have a lizard infestation they're not telling us about? He suits up and follows them, getting jumped by the Lizard where the film makes the VERY unfortunate decision of having the villain freaking TALK.

A Ghoul Versus The Amazing Spider-Man (Part 1)

“It is WAY past time for a Spider-Man reboot, after all it's been FIVE YEARS!”

Hollywood is going through a weird phase right now: they're handing over a huge percentage of their summer blockbuster movies to Indie Darlings. You currently have James Gunn, creator of legendary films such as Tromeo And Juliet, currently ruling the box office with his smash hit Guardians of the Galaxy. Christopher Nolan, Joss Whedon, and Jon Favreau are among the names who started off with tiny independent films now making movies that bring in BILLIONS.

Hoping to capture some of this magic in their own bottle, Sony Pictures hired Marc Webb to helm their Spider-Man reboot. Webb is another Indie Darling well know for his Little Film That Could, the much beloved (even by myself) 500 Days of Summer, so that means we're at the least assured a film that will have some strong characterization in it. That was definitely something that was lacking from the original Spider-Man trilogy, so that's a lot of elements already in place for a good film.

But enough with the positives, let's get to the negatives! The worst glaring one here is the primary writer of this movie, one James Vanderbilt. He is a writer who LOVES his convoluted and overly complex films, especially my personal favourite Basic which is basically Screenwriting 101 for how NOT to do a movie. He is a dangerous writer to be crafting such a simple story, as I seriously doubt he'll be able to keep his tropes in check.  Let's mix all those elements together and see how the latest Hollywood superhero reboot turned out, strap on your web-slingers and get ready for A Ghoul Versus The Amazing Spider-Man!

A Ghoul Versus Man Of Steel (Part 2)

Click here for Part 1!

Back in the present, Clark goes to church for advice because I guess Jor-El's off filming Noah or something and is too busy to talk. He tells the priest that he's the one Zod wants but doesn't know what to do about it. The priest asks what his feelings tell him, Clark replying Zod can't be trusted but he's not sure the people of Earth can either. Clark goes to leave, the priest telling him sometimes you have to take a leap of faith first and that trust will come later. Most of this scene has Clark's face framed against a giant image of Jesus because this movie sucks. Subtlety, thy name sure as Hell isn't Zack Snyder.

Clark meets with the military, telling them he'll surrender if they free Lois. He is handcuffed and taken into custody in one of the movie's more famous scenes that aren't unintentionally comical. He meets with Lois in an interrogation room, their conversation interrupted by Fake Dr. Hamilton who wants to yammer on about stuff. Through their dialogue, we learn Clark is 33. You know who else was 33? Jesus! I wonder if this film's trying to tell us something...

A Ghoul Versus Man Of Steel (Part 1)

"If you think about it, this movie is about a boy who grows up to be a mass murderer after being raised by two of the worst fathers in recorded history..."

Superman Returns was released in 2006, a year after Warner Brothers released Batman Begins to critical acclaim and financial success, hoping Superman would be their next big franchise to compete in the rapidly expanding comic book movie genre.  The film, while successful, wasn't the breakaway hit they hoped for and the franchise was shelved for several years. In 2010 it was announced director Christopher Nolan and writer David S. Goyer, two of the main brains behind the now monstrously huge Batman franchise, had been hired to produce and write the film respectively.

Extremely polarizing director Zack Snyder, most famous for the two hour slow motion fight scene called 300, was hired to direct. Snyder was no stranger to comic book adaptions, in 2009 having made the also very polarizing film Watchmen which I once read described as “loved by fans because it was like the book and hated by fans because it was like the book”.  Fans feared the combination of these talents would lead to a dark take on Superman, a hero who is usually not in such stories. These fears were compounded by earlier teaser trailers, which made the movie to look every bit as dark as people suspected it would be. How did it turn out? Let's find out with A Ghoul Versus The Man of Steel.