That your fear seems to hide deep inside your mind
All alone I have cried silent tears full of pride
In a world made of steel, made of stone
Well I hear the music, close my eyes, feel the rhythm
Wrap around, take a hold of my heart- WAIT NOT LIKE THAT! AAAAAIIIIEEEEE!!!!!"
The Archangel
Gabriel led a revolt against Heaven, enraged that mankind was getting
his love over that of the angels. The war was a stalemate until the
angels discovered a soul on Earth so dark and powerful that whoever
possessed it would win the war.
An angel named
Simon found the soul first, but badly botched the plan to collect it.
He ended up breaking Megan's Law and passing it to a little girl, who
had to rely on a police detective and a school teacher to protect
her. They performed
about as well as you'd expect two humans to do facing an omnipotent
angel, so the Devil himself had to get involved to save the day and
kill Gabriel. Yes, in a religious movie the Devil turned out to be
the hero. So how did the
movie makers find a way to make a sequel to a story that had
concluded? Let's find out in part two of the Prophecy saga, with A
Ghoul Versus The Prophecy II!
Everything begins
as we get a montage of Biblical images as hands write in a journal.
This is all narrated by Thomas, the star of Part One. He is still
having the visions, showing him the war didn't end with Gabriel's
death. The years haven't been kind to him, as he has become a monk
and is slowly being driven crazy by the visions. He's so worn down
he's completely changed appearance from the first movie! In Los Angeles,
Jennifer Beals drives to the hospital where she works as a nurse. Her
mundane trip is interrupted by a guy who falls on top of her car from
above. I wonder if her insurance covers that? Do you think
Progressive offers a discount for your car getting hit by a fallen
angel involved in a civil war for control of Heaven?
In a deserted part
of town, the Devil (played by Not-Viggo-Mortensen) arrives and kicks
Gabriel out of Hell, saying it isn't big enough for the two of them.
He touches the ground and then vanishes to go do Not-Viggo-Mortensen
things. The ground splits open and Gabriel claws his way out of Hell. Jennifer goes to
visit the guy she hit, learning his name is Danyael and noticing he
has a very distinct brand on his neck. Thomas prays as Gabriel
appears in his room. He knows about the visions, asking where “she”
is. Thomas won't answer so Gabriel incinerates him for his
obstinance.
Jennifer brings
Dan his clothes, having had them dry cleaned. He walks her home, the
two having quite the chemistry that ends up with them having sex. I
wonder if he's a hermaphrodite like Tommy Wiseau was in the first
movie? Bet that was an awkward conversation when the pants came off! Dan vanishes
afterward to meet with a fellow angel named Rafayel, telling him it
is done and Jennifer is pregnant. Rafayel is upset it took so long,
Dan saying that Michael told him not to force her. They get attacked
by two angels working for Gabriel, but manage to kill both of them by
ripping their hearts out. A homeless woman witnesses Dan killing his
attacker.
As this is going
on, Gabriel enters the building where the two angels first met and finds the dry cleaning receipt Dan had in his coat pocket. He kills
Rafayel but Dan manages to escape. Gabriel goes to the dry
cleaner, hilariously trying to get the identity of the owner of the
ticket out of the clerk. When this fails, he breaks out the Sleep
Touch but realizes he's screwed because he has no idea how to operate
a computer. Back at her house,
Jennifer is now feeling very sick. Her grandmother thinks she is pregnant, and
they get it a rather excessive shouting match over it. Joke's on her
though, the hospital confirms she IS pregnant! Not just that, but she's in
her second trimester which is quite the shock considering her and Dan
only had sex a couple of days ago.
We join two young
lovers about to commit suicide, played by the late Brittany Murphy
and Danny Strong, best known as Jonathan from Buffy the Vampire Slayer. Gabriel watches
them as they drive into a brick wall at full speed, which seems about
the most inefficient way to kill yourself I can think of. Danny dies but Brittany is not quite dead, Gabriel using his powers to keep
her alive because he needs her help. The cops call
Jennifer in to look at the dead body of one of the angels, able to
trace his murder back to Dan because he left his medical ID bracelet
at the scene of the crime as well as testimony of the
homeless woman. Being a litter bug is REALLY starting to bite Dan in
this ass, isn't it?
Joseph from the
first movie comes into the room to talk to Jennifer, telling her
about the angel's body they found four years ago and how everyone
involved is now dead. He strongly advises her to GTFO as he
leaves in a hurry, probably because he has dinner plans with
Jerry Seinfeld in a few minutes and really wants that soup. Jennifer gets a
nosebleed at the end of this scene, but it's never brought up or
mentioned again so... yeah. She goes to the monastery Joseph
mentioned Thomas lived at before his death, talking to the Father
there about him. He gives her Thomas's Journal Full of Crazy, and
talks about a prophecy he saw in his visions that Heaven and Earth
would be united by a child born of an angel and a human. Jennifer pores
over the journal, realizing the angelic script in it matches the mark
Dan had on his neck. Gabriel
takes Brittany back to the dry cleaners to operate the computer for
him and find Jennifer's address. She cracks a joke that makes me
laugh way too hard because I'm old: “So
you're keeping me alive because you don't know DOS?”.
I
now hope this movie gets remade someday so this joke can be replaced
with one harshing on Windows 8. Jennifer arrives
home, finding the door wide open. Because she's never seen a movie
before in her life, she goes inside. She finds her grandmother dead
with Gabriel perched next to her. Dan arrives and fights off the
Archangel, allowing Jennifer to escape. But instead of
getting in her car and DRIVING AWAY at top speed, she chooses to run
down the street. Gabriel and Brittany easily catch up to her in their
car, chasing her down an alley and cornering her in a dead end.
Brittany doesn't want to kill her but Gabriel says if she doesn't
he'll never let her die. She buckles up and drives the car towards
Jennifer at full speed. This
franchise has a mad on for car crashing into walls, doesn't it?
Jennifer jumps
onto a fence at the last second, the car smashing into the wall and
sending Gabriel flying. Brittany literally advises Jennifer to GTFO,
which she does, running into Dan who takes her to a nearby church. She's naturally
very upset at him as he tries to explain about the Prophecy and the
child that has been given to her. She doesn't believe him, so he
reveals his true form to her. We don't see what it is, only a winged
silhouette, but it causes her to break down and sob. At this point I
want to mention Jennifer's acting hasn't impressed me at all in this
movie, but this was a very well done scene.
At the crash
scene, a cop interviews Gabriel who brushed off his collision with
the wall just fine. He uses his Sleep Touch to take the cop's gun and
radio, which he is very impressed by. Walken is just amazing in this
scene, his childlike wonder at technology is something you MUST see.
He takes these items to Brittany, asking her how they work. She grabs
the gun and tries to kill herself, but remains alive. Walken gives
her another epic speech on why she needs to listen to him, the
transition from comedy to terror truly outstanding.
Dan tells Jennifer
the plan was for her to have the baby and raise it, the angels
stealing it at some point. He decides he needs to get her to his
leader Michael, who will protect her. She mentions Thomas's Journal
Full of Crazy, which Dan goes to get to see if it has any information
that can help them. He tells her to
stay in the church, as even Gabriel wouldn't care to kill her there.
As he leaves he unknowingly trips a silent alarm, which sends out a
call to all available police officers. Gabriel hears this on his
stolen radio, logically concluding this is where he'd take Jennifer
if he were Dan.
Gabriel and
Brittany go to the church, Brittany waiting outside while Gabriel
goes inside to find Jennifer. The cops pull up to the church as
Gabriel exits, dragging Jennifer by the hair. The cops open fire on
Gabriel, Dan arriving just in time to get Jennifer to safety but
dropping the journal he just retrieved in the process. Later the police
interrogate Brittany about Gabriel. She tells them the truth but of
course they don't believe her. Gabriel awakens in the morgue and
Sleep Touches his way through the station, rescuing Brittany. He
looks through the journal the police confiscated and realizes Dan is
taking Jennifer to Eden.
Eden has become an
old abandoned factory yard, angels perched everywhere. I can believe
a lot of stuff, but they want me to believe Eden is in California?
Jennifer walks up some stairs to meet Michael, which the camera
reveals in a slow pan is played by Eric Roberts. You can tell he's
in a hurry to get this over with, as he has probably thirty other
movies he needs to go be in today. Michael prattles
on with a whole lot of nothing and then leaves to greet Gabriel, who
has just arrived outside the gates of the factory. Michael asks
Gabriel to give up or he'll face a punishment worse than any angel
has ever had. Gabriel doesn't relent as Michael strangely lets him
inside to get Jennifer and tells him none of his angels will try to
stop him. Dan disobeys
Michael, telling Jennifer to run as he faces off against Gabriel.
Brittany, armed with a blade, goes after Jennifer and gets the drop
on her.
Gabriel easily
kills Dan, tearing his heart out. He goes to find Jennifer, however
gets jumped by Brittany. He throws her onto a spike, leaving her to
die. What is VERY ODD about this scene is Brittany is now wearing
Jennifer's coat. I'm thinking a scene got cut here or something, as I
assume she let Jennifer go and took her coat in an attempt to
trick Gabriel so she could stab him but I don't know... Jennifer jumps out
and starts beating Gabriel with a pipe, trying to stab him but he
throws her off. She runs away with him in pursuit, the two ending up
on a suspended platform high above the ground. She reveals to him she
can suddenly hear God, Gabriel asking what He's saying. The answer is
“jump” and she grabs Gabriel, jumping off the platform. They come
crashing down on a fence, Gabriel's body breaking the fall for
Jennifer. Gabriel
also gets impaled on a spike for good measure, because by law bad
guys always fall on something pointy.
Michael walks up
to them, burning the sigil off Gabriel's neck and making him what he
loathes the most: a human. Jennifer tells Michael that Dan was the
only angel worth anything because he cared and that she will not let
anyone take her child. Very powerful dialogue ruined by Jennifer's
monotone line reading. She leaves Eden, stopping to take the journal
off the hood of Gabriel's car parked outside. Five years later,
Jennifer sees her son off as he boards the school bus. We follow the
bus as it passes Gabriel, now a homeless man playing his trumpet on
the streets. He's confident everything will be made right and God
will restore him back to angelic status. Dammit,
Walken even makes being homeless look cool.
Cue the credits.
Like I mentioned
before, this was a Direct to Video release and honestly it's one of
the best ones I've ever seen. It was co-written and directed by Greg
Spence, a man who has gone on to GREAT success producing shows for
HBO such as Generation Kill and a little something called Game
of Thrones. He did a fantastic job here taking what must have
been a miniscule budget and turning out something that could have
easily been in a theater. This does suffer
from some bouts of sequelitis, in which it rehashes a lot from the
first movie (Gabriel is on a nonstop hunt to kill someone, he has
comedy scenes with his sidekick, most of the movie is our heroes
running away), but they add enough original material so it doesn't
feel like it.
Walken hits
another home run here, as he absolutely owns this movie. However
Brittany Murphy is also EXCELLENT here, every scene with these two in
it just kills. It really is a shame she could never find her foothold
as an actor, she could be excellent when given the right material.
Everyone else in the film is very forgettable, especially our leads
who only have one speed: flat and monotone. I will say it was awesome
to have an Asian actor in a starring role of a movie that didn't
involve the usual stereotypes you see.
The story was MUCH
more cohesive than the first one, pretty much every character's
actions and motivations made sense this time. Hell, I think my only
real issue was the continuity in a couple of scenes like Jennifer's
nosebleed and Brittany wearing Jennifer's coat, but that's just
extreme nitpicking on my part. We're two for two
now on this series, as I have really been enjoying these and wish I'd
have watched it years ago. If you haven't yet, definitely check both
of the movies out. Can we go for the trifecta with The
Prophecy 3: The Ascent?
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